Cruising Into The Future

One of the most meaningful things I do with my free time is mentoring a young teenager named Matthew. Mentoring is an incredibly rewarding experience. I highly recommend it! It's a great way to personally grow and give back to your community. I wrote an essay recently about what I've learned from my mentee. Mentors can be students too...

When it comes to the mentoring experience, it’s fertile ground for life lessons and building character. The challenges give way to constructing patience, creativity, communication skills, and empathy. The rewards are all of the fruits that come with caring intentionally, and sometimes intensely, about someone else – someone you can teach, relate to, learn from, share with, and ultimately influence in a positive way. Keep that word in mind: Influence.

I recall a time with Matthew when I was helping him with a math assignment. He had been really struggling with the material for a while and we had been working on the subject for months. Usually, I’ll help him when he gets stuck and use that opportunity to teach. It’s easy to sometimes get discouraged and frustrated when understanding is achieved at a slower pace. It’s customary that whenever Matthew understands what I’ve explained to him, I ask him for a high five to celebrate. It’s my simple way of trying to stay positive and motivated. This time, however, was the moment of truth, a test. Matthew was going to take a test on the material he had recently learned without my help. He had to figure out the problems on his own. I watched as he started working on the first problem. I was able to observe him thinking, struggling, remembering, and calculating. After finishing the first problem, he asked me to check it. I said, “Matt, you have to finish the whole test first.” He replied, “I need to know!” I checked his work and he got the correct answer. At that moment, his eyes lit up, he smiled and threw his hands in the air and said, “High five!” It was the first time he initiated the high five.

I think this story highlights what I’ve learned from Matthew so far. Sometimes, all it takes is a math problem and a high five moment to fully realize the importance of this special relationship. When our hands collided, I saw empowerment in Matthew’s eyes. He believed in himself. He knew he was smart. He finished the test, making significant progress, and knew that he could do better. Matthew has taught me that teaching is more than just instruction, that relationship matters, and that encouragement goes a long way. I’ve learned that the most powerful tools are trust and authenticity and that, using these tools, Matthew influences me as well! He encourages me, empowers me, challenges me, laughs at me, listens to me, sometimes corrects me, and always inspires me. I’ve learned from my mentee that I can always do better, and I’m grateful to him for helping me grow. Positive influence goes both ways.